Food and Drink

Imaginary Eats
With Lauren Lafayette Brooks

Freshly Pleased Juices ****

Due to multiple complaints and general upset from local clientele, I have been

forced to review a rather controversial cafe, under new ownership. The well-known

and well-loved downtown juice bar has been revamped into an adult juice

boutique. Perviously Freshly Squeezed Juice Bar is now Freshly Pleased Juice

Boutique, and many a loyal customer has been put off by the change. The cafe is

still providing delicious organic juices, made fresh to order, in a variety of flavours.

However, the new owners have renamed all the menu items to coincide with their

new adult theme and clientele. The menu now includes some of the following:

Pear o’ Melons ( pear and watermelon juice), Date-Grape ( Grape juice with date

puree), Nice Citr-ass ( a mix of lemon, lime, grapefruit and orange) and Banana

Hammock ( banana, pineapple and orange). As my readers can imagine these

new names have caused quite a stir and I found myself compelled to write this

review. Upon entering the cafe, I found the uniforms to be drastically different! The

Naughty Librarian at the front counter was very helpful and suggested a few of

their best sellers: Menage et trois-berries, Some like it in the Plum or Blueberry

Balls. In the end, I ordered a sample of three, and had a seat in the new seating

area ( I say seat, but in truth, it was a swing). I watched as the Dominatrix

prepared my juices, then they were brought to me by a charming server dressed

as a School Girl. My sample included the following: Peaches and Creamed (

peach juice and coconut whip topping), Pop your Cherry and Chocolate ( sour

cherry juice and dark chocolate puree) and PBSM ( peanut butter and soy milk),

for the very reasonable price of $16.69. I must say that I enjoyed all of the juices!

The mix of sour cherry and dark chocolate was especially pleasing and the PBSM

is an excellent choice for a protein shake (it can be made with oat or coconut milk

instead of soy if desired). The service was excellent and everyone was very

friendly. Before I knew it I had ended up staying the whole evening. While this new

take of a juice bar isn’t for everyone, it is certainly top quality and a haven for the

open minded.

The Vegetarian Veterinarian *****

If you are a pet owner with a sick pet or just an animal in need of a check up, it is

often difficult to find a bite to eat while you wait for your pets appointment. Add to

the mix being a non-meat eating person, which many of our animal lover are, and

you are really in a pickle. Well look no further, here to support this huge niche

market is a new restaurant : The Vegetarian Veterinarian. What better

combination could you ask for but enjoying a tasty meal with waiting for your sick

or injured pet! I am not a pet owner myself; so to enjoy this wonderful new spot I

had to borrow a friends chinchilla, Alfred. Alfred accompanied me and very much

enjoyed the Chin-Chilly and corn chips. The menu was so full of wonderful


options, I really struggled to pick just a few items. I was sorely tempted by the stir-

fried poodle noodles, puppy “chow”der and Collar-d greens and cocker-spiral


pasta. But in the end, I enjoyed a 3 course meal and drinks at the very reasonable

of $95.00 ( this included a nail trim, deworming, flea check and grooming for


Alfred), easily the best pet care/meal value in town! I started with a Parakeet-a-

Margarita in a fishbowl size. When I added an extra shot of tequila in my drink, I


was thrilled to see the bartender add the shot with a “shot”, using a syringe to


inject my drink- how cute! For a starter, I enjoyed two appetizers: a garden salad-

mander and garlic bread with fleas ( non-dairy cheese substitute). The salad was


very fresh and I was informed that the greens came from a local garden that was

frequented by rabbits and mice. For my main course I enjoyed: the spaghetti and

fur-balls, and was pleased to see the menu offered a gluten free pasta option

which is much apprechiated by the gluten free animal and humans alike. Finally, I

treated myself to a dessert and after-meal drink. It was a tough choice but the

Chocolate Moose with mice cream won in the end, accompanied by a Rabies

cappuccino ( leaves the mouth foamy) available in pumpkin spice or apple

cinnamon flavours. I was so delighted with the fare, I took a few items to go (

Cauliflower Crate Crunch and Turtleshell Tacos) and enjoyed them both. The

excellent staff also host a Sunday brunch and play, allowing pet owners to dine

while their dogs run and play in the dog park, for a reasonable $45 ( poop and

scoop included). This meal consists of eggs of your choice, Husky Hashbrowns,

sliced tomatoes and don’t-leave-them-baked-in-the-car Beans. All in all a five star

rating, a do not miss for all pet owners, as they say at the Vegetarian Veterinarian

” You came for the food but you “spaid” for the service!”